Day 1

Today I am starting a blog to help assist me in recognizing the "babysteps" I've taken to grow and improve toward my goals. Since I lack a real support system, motivation and berate myself, it tends to go unnoticed. But it is the babysteps each day that helped build the pyramid (so we think). Tiny as some of these things may be I need to build up my confidence and stay focused daily towards accomplishing goals. So, here goes.

1-16-2013

I woke up at 4:11am; got on my phone and browsed pinterest and facebook from 4:30-6:00am (while laying in bed in the dark. felt pretty lazy afterwards, but it was cold and I usually get up at 8am so i wasnt quite awake. Well, really just my excuse. I was wide awake, but couldnt decided what to do first if I got up, so I spaced on the internet to avoid.)

Got up 6:00am, showered from 6:05-6:15, moisturized legs (I usually forget or run out of time), peel strips on face for blackheads (way overdue, grosss, but i had time and actually remembered), brushed teeth and hair.

6:50am - Problem. Layed back down and snoozed until 9am. I set an alarm for 8am, but apparently slept through.

Baby step- I got up and showered earlier than normal (6am in stead of 8, 830 or 9am).

Apparent problems: I couldnt just get up and go. Mind not shutting up on what to work on first. System overload. -Got up way earlier than typical and feel back asleep, convinced myself a tiny nap wouldnt hurt.

Solutions/Goals: Make a to do list, A REALISTIC list -before I go to bed. Have it close to the bed so in the morning I can look at it and just get up and go. Review just before bed incase any new things came up or changes.

-Dont ever take a nap, I'll always end up sleeping too long. I can always go to bed early.

so, it's 10 am now. I am going to eat, do the dishes and get ready for work at Noon.
Feeling: worthless, lazy, stupid, annoyed, like this shouldn't be so difficult (motivation and direction), confused, frustrated, worried, lost

Motivation: This to shall pass, it's the babysteps moving foward that conquer the mountain, not the mountain crashing and falling. I believe in myself, I am smart, reliable, worthwhile. My problems are not as severe as many others who are starving or have no place to live.